Tips on avoiding contact with customers during the Christmas season

I hate talking to customers during the holiday shopping season. Everyone is crazy. Associates are crazy and mad, customers are crazy and mad. No one is happy, really. Since I can't really avoid associates (they have to pass through my domain twice a day minimum), I like to avoid customers like the plague. Here are some tips:

1. Avert your eyes. Do not greet or smile at customers. If you don't look at them, it's harder for them to stop you.
2. Walk fast and with a purpose. If you look like you're in a rush, people don't want to bother you.
3. Whenever possible, carry a large and difficult package or boxed kitchen appliance. If you're carrying something heavy and difficult, customers aren't going to stop you.
4. Keep to the sidelines. Only go out when absolutely necessary and when going out keep to the periphery of the store.
5. Wear jeans. Jeans make it clear that you are not a floor employee and do in fact belong in the stock room.
6. Carry a PDT, or other important looking retail device. I don't know what that stands for, but it's the thing that prints price tags. You carry that and walk with purpose, no one really messes with you. You are on a mission to get them a better deal. Not them personally, but they get the picture.
7. If all else fails, go with the "I don't know I'm only the gift wrapper" bit. This is helped by having lots of ribbon on your person.

I just heard a story in NPR about the increased risk of suicide in Vegas. The results of the study were just that, that residents and visitors face a higher risk of suicide. The causes are unclear. I think they found that the deaths were not necessarily related to gambling or monetary losses. It was very interesting.

Gambling is something I just do not understand. You know that the house will win. Overwhelmingly and regularly. How can you go into something knowing you will likely lose?

Ok so I am still listening to this show on NPR and they are talking about the year's best songs. This guy was SHOCKED that bands that people are familiar with (like Death Cab for Cutie and My Morning Jacket) are not at the top of the list. Listen, dude, you're not young. Neither of those bands have been up there for years. Seriously, Death Cab? Nothing after Transatlanticism is worth listening to! And really everything they did prior to that was really building to that record. My Morning Jacket? They haven't had a hit among indie crowds for years. Were they ever particularly popular? I just really think it's funny when old folks try to stay up on this stuff. It's a young person's game. I feel the same way about the podcast "The Sound of Young America". The host is pretty outdated but still claims to be America's Radio Sweetheart and the Voice of Young America. God I hope he isn't my voice.

Maybe this is a bit harsh. The sting of youth, perhaps?